Ended up being an incorrect error message in Chrome...that was actually an incorrect error in libxml2! I was giddy about finding a bug that deep in the stack.
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So, I decided to see about submitting a patch to libxml2. It does not live on GitHub. You can't just open a PR. So I googled the libxml2 site to learn about the submission process...
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At the top of the home page is this quote: "Programming with libxml2 is like the thrilling embrace of an exotic stranger." I gave up right there. That confusing error message still exists.
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I shit you not. That quote is still at the top of the libxml2 homepage http://xmlsoft.org/
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