Re sexual harassment / "what a bad time this is to be a man I can't flirt anymore": as a lesbian, that's literally the last thing I care about
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Lots of people make fun of polyamorous people, but they are the leading authority on communication and consent!
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I briefly dated a girl who was married to a man, they both identified as gay (!) and also had same sex main bf/gfs. They were obsessed with consent.
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Basically - only main partner can come home, other randoms outside; everybody needs to be tested; it was glorious. Never confusing. Direct, simple, super communicative
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Straight people do consent terribly. All of these things we are debating / discovering: poly / queer / others have learned (1) ask (2) don't assume (3) your target isn't stupid. Maybe (3) is key.
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Hetero men are so often brought up to believe women don't know what we want / our decisions should be made for us. As a queer woman I too have had to deal with this —
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God forbid I ever tell a man hitting on me that I'm queer! It only makes him decide for me — I haven't tried him! It's a challenge!
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I've been lucky to have been surrounded by progressive people. But I remember one time working at restaurant age 18: coming out was hell, but only there. Super macho setting. Work dudes disrespectful/aggravated at *my* sexuality
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So many tech folks in SG convinced these sexual harassment stories don't exist in sg. Coz, Singapore is so great. Dude, your friends are doing it, and we all know who
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End of conversation
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