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  1. BREAKING: (thanks Hillary!):

  2. 10 Sep 2013

    It's not I'm worried about tonight, it's Anthony Weiners.

  3. 10 Sep 2013

    Pet name for UN inspectors: Choom Gang.

  4. 10 Sep 2013

    I, Barack Obama, have granted and by these presents do grant a full, free, and absolute pardon unto Bashir Assad ...

  5. 10 Sep 2013

    He can see Russia from his house.

  6. 10 Sep 2013

    Obama will tell us that the real plan all along was for Russia to step in. They just needed a little push.

  7. 10 Sep 2013

    RT It seems Romney was right about Syria. And Russia. And Benghazi.

  8. 10 Sep 2013

    Bomb Syria...? Me? i never wanted to bomb Syria. It was always the chemical weapons I wanted.

  9. 10 Sep 2013

    As a superb community organizer I have come to the conclusion that I am way over my head in international affairs.

  10. 10 Sep 2013

    RT : On second thought, Assad isn't much like Hitler after all.

  11. 10 Sep 2013
    Replying to

    He's the reincarnation of Aleksandr Kerensky

  12. 10 Sep 2013

    Welcomes Dennis Rodman to his administration

  13. 10 Sep 2013

    RT Has Obama ordered the dismantling of our missiles in Turkey yet?

  14. 10 Sep 2013

    This is my real birth certificate and these are my college transcripts.

  15. 10 Sep 2013

    RT : We didn't actually look up the word "unilateral" until today. Oops, our bad.

  16. 10 Sep 2013

    "I finally got around to reading the Constitution. Of course, I don't agree with it, but I read it!"

  17. 10 Sep 2013
    Replying to

    Actually, Michelle is itchin' to nuke Assad.

  18. 10 Sep 2013

    I really hate America.

  19. 10 Sep 2013

    "My truth is I'm a gay American. Reggie and I are outta here."

  20. 10 Sep 2013

    I knew I should have taken Russian in school. They own us now.

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