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the kazio contaminant
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If you can't beat em, sell it to em.
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Our suicide packs come with a gun, a bullet, and a blank to practice working up the nerve. Thing is, a .45 blank will blow your brains out even without a projectile, so the 'real' bullets are actually duds.
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WE LOVE TWITTER BECAUSE EVERYONE HERE ENOURAGES EACH OTHER TO RESIST EFFORT, CRITICAL SELF-ANALYSIS, AND ACTUAL SELF-IMPROVEMENT. ONLY DO THINGS THAT ARE COMFORTABLE. ONLY TALK TO PEOPLE THAT AFFIRM YOUR SELF INDUGLENCE. YOU AND YOU ALONE ARE ABLE TO KNOW WHAT IS BEST.
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OUR CEO HAS NO CONTROL OVER THIS COMPANY, THE MONSTER IS SO MUCH BIGGER THAN YOU KNOW, WE DON'T KNOW WHERE HALF THESE ORDERS COME FROM BUT WE'VE SOLD THEM TOO MANY GUNS TO TURN THEM AWAY NOW
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That was an awful thing to say to you. An awful lot of things that have built up over weeks, months. They can't keep talking to you like that. Would you like it to stop? Here, look - sonic poison. Seven words that will stop their heart for a beat and lash their ears. Interested?
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NOT SURE WHAT THIS SWITCH DOES BUT LET'S HOPE IT KILLS SOMETHING
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Hello! Fuck off!
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We are dribbling misery into your bloodstream while you sleep! It reacts with the lethargy we put in your water! We are steering Western civilization into the maw and you will impale yourself on our teeth because there was velvet rope in front of the exit!
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Residents! Remember to rub the sleep in your eyes out into the bedside bowl. Once you've taken your breakfast and mood stabilizers, report to sub-head office D, atrium B for today's objectives. Have a productive day and remember: resistance will be met with casually lethal force.
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We are not! Your! Friends!
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We have thousands of hours of tape of her voice, hundreds of pitch-perfect soliloquies and poems she never read to you that we can dispense in exchange for your cooperation. She'll never see you again, but if you close your eyes in the dark, you can almost see her.
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VR is one of our proudest innovations. Coupled with the dosing of isolated water tables and the observation of control populations, the promising but ultimately failed work of MKUltra has been resumed. We will also be giving away Oculus Rifts later in the week, stay tuned!
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To the shareholders, Salguerre continues its meteoric rise with another extremely lucrative quarter. We expect this continue on account of a new technology that allows us access to that damnable f̶o̷r̵t̸y̷ ̵t̴w̸o̶ ̷e̴x̴ ̸s̴e̷v̷e̶n̷. The sun sets on him. Thank you. -mgmt
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