at a sex workshop and thinking about a thing @leashless said once about (IIRC) how western neo-tantra fails because people shouldn't approach sex stuff before coming to terms with death
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the messaging of this workshop is super hedonistic ("have better sex forever!") in a way that i know just works well for americans but that i still personally find intensely frustrating. hedonism hides behind pretending we aren't gonna grow old and die
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it's easy along the personal growth path to get stuck in thinking that the point is to feel better. getting past self-denial is important but feeling better is radically not the point and pursuing that becomes narcissistic eventually
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Replying to @QiaochuYuan
Confused by this, now as always. I've never been able to truly believe in a notion of "good" that didn't ground out in "feel good, but more so, and in the long term, and in a way that also helps others feel good".
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Replying to @s_r_constantin @QiaochuYuan
Like, being hedonistic in the stereotypical sense (drugs! sex! food!) has bad consequences and is often more about symbolically doing a thing labeled "pleasure", or proving to yourself that you're allowed to, than about actually tasting marvelous experiences.
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But I still basically think marvelous experiences are what life is *for*? The only things that I can see valuing for their own sake are basically aesthetic immersive experiences (="play")
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