Mental hack for feelings of insecurity or craving validation: do something you feel like doing, right now, in the moment.
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Craving validation or social strokes in a way that isn't information-seeking -- like, "tell me I'm OK" -- seems like it's isomorphic to wanting to do some specific thing you've been inhibiting yourself from doing. Once you do the thing, the craving subsides.
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Helping people is an action you can personally take; having them be happy isn’t.
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My having neither to weigh thought nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that your faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away ~ DCraik 1859
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