Punishment can be a self-replicating meme in the following way. If you were punished for doing something fun, and this hurt you & messed up your motivation structure, you'll resent others you see "getting away with" the same behavior, and punish them, out of envy.
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"Tall poppy syndrome" -- people being mean to others for being too successful, too outspoken, too "attention-seeking", having too much fun or too much good fortune -- happens because the attackers *wish they could have those things too.*
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Being scared of envious "haters" makes you do dumb things out of cowardice, being angry at them makes you do dumb things out of resentment, and denying that they matter to you makes you suffer (because being in denial about problems *is* what suffering is.)
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I don't think I have a solution but I think the appropriate emotion is *sadness*. It is sad when other people have been hurt or don't have the same good fortune as you. Sometimes you can help, sometimes you can't. But acknowledge, and really emotionally process, that it's sad.
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Sometimes this means you need to have compassion for illegible harms -- like, maybe the hater in question is socioeconomically privileged, but someone in his youth made him feel shitty for caring sincerely about anything, and now he's trying to follow that "rule". That's sad too.
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