"You aren't going to wear green?" "You aren't making corned beef and cabbage?" "You aren't drinking a Guinness?" "Why no festive music with bagpipes?" BUT IT'S ST. PATRICKS DAY, ISN'T THAT YOUR THING?!?! Sure isn't. Never really has been.
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I make corned beef meals all year long, don't need a holiday for it. If I wanted to make something Irish, I'd make a coddle or something. Wearing green (or orange) actually MEANT something, it was a message. And not one I care to send or remind other of.
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I don't drink a lot of Guinness. There are better stouts. I don't mind the occasional one, but I'm certainly not going to go buy some on ceremony. Bagpipes are... you know honestly nevermind I'm not going to go there. Not worth it.
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This is usually where I get told that I should just relax and have fun, that "MOST" Irish people aren't so thin skinned, I should appreciate people celebrating. Only, you're not. You're just dying shitty beer green and making an ass of yourself. Which you'll do again on May 5.
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Anyway I have now ranted pointlessly about a silly drinking holiday. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.
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Fuck green food coloring beer. Everyone knows you make green beer with Gatorade. By *everyone I mean the mad scientists at
@HiddenSpringAle (a berliner, I liked it)pic.twitter.com/b2hdHyu8VB
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See, I wouldn't say no to that.
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Likely second only to NYE as far as volume of vomit goes. But second to none in terms of green vomit.
Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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And ol Russel gonna start up The Troubles again.
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Oh no...
#Brexit has that taken care of..
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