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@roxiqt

Extremely online internet goblin & raccoon enthusiast • roxiqt on • WEB COMIC: • STORE:

(GTA) the Gothest Toronto area
Vrijeme pridruživanja: kolovoz 2014.
Rođen/a 13. srpnja

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    2. kol 2018.

    FRIEND: It's called cauliflower. It's not ghost broccoli. ME: [taking a long drag on my cigarette] Listen kid, I know what I saw.

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. pro 2017.

    [minutes after eating mac & cheese] u know what would be amazing right now- and honestly it’s been a while since I’ve had it- mac & cheese

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  3. 2. velj

    All I want for Valentine's Day is a large lasagna & an 18 hour nap on top of my refrigerator.

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  4. 1. velj

    FINDING A VALENTINE • difficult & time consuming • makes you feel vulnerable BUYING A NEW SWORD • fast & easy • you will NOT feel vulnerable • someone might see you & think "who is the cool person with the sword? I'd like to buy them chicken nuggets in a romantic setting"

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    10. velj 2019.

    If you're single on Valentine's Day, it's not because you're undesirable or unattractive. It's because you didn't take the time to summon a demon & ask it out on a date and that is 100% your fault.

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    13. svi 2014.

    Girl, are you a barnacle? Because you suck and I can't get you off my boat

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj 2018.

    If you run out of pet names for your partner, just call them assorted baking ingredients: sugar, honey, cinnamon, vanilla, garlic powder, Montreal steak seasoning, butter, pumpkin.

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  8. 31. sij

    I'm not like other girls. I'm a tiny little goblin protecting a pile of old spoons & I cry "Noooo! My spoons!" whenever someone tries to take one.

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    25. sij

    ages 14-25: i would like to listen to more bands ages 26-??: i have listened to enough bands, now i would like power

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  10. 31. sij

    GOING TO THE CLUB • expensive & exhausting • people might bump into you STAYING HOME SICK • free & easy • unlimited naps • people will go out of their way to avoid touching you at all costs

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    11. stu 2014.

    uh actually going through life on 4-5hrs of sleep per night is a perfectly way of doing functioning for having to doing. in your living time

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  12. 30. sij

    Call me old fashioned but I was raised to serve my wife. I clean the dishes and cook her food. I do whatever she says because she's my wife & she makes the rules around the house. She owns me. I am her property. If she ever cheats, it's because I was lacking & that's on me.

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  13. 30. sij

    The only time sex counts as premarital sex is if you plan to get married. If you don't plan to get married to that person, God says it is actually fine.

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    12. lip 2013.

    I wonder if caterpillars know they're gonna fly some day or they just start building a cocoon and are like 'why am I doing this'.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    28. sij

    When it's late & you're thinking about a large boulder the size of a small boulder again.

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    7. kol 2018.

    [How I imagined my 20s as a kid] partying, drinking, staying out all night [What my 20s are actually like] keeping a close eye on the birds in the backyard because I'm pretty sure they are in a rival gang that opposes the squirrels & I wanna see how that drama plays out honestly

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    15. lip 2019.

    FRIEND: Your kitchen looks great ME: Wanna see the new garbage disposal? FRIEND: Sure ME: [opening cupboard to reveal a large raccoon napping] His name is Boris

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    1. ruj 2018.

    i did what i needed to do to survive, then i did a bunch of other stuff i felt like doing.

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    17. lip 2019.

    GETTING MARRIED • expensive & boring • you might get divorced BEFRIENDING FOREST CREATURES • affordable & exciting • you have a lifelong bond • the animals will help you clean the house

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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    19. sij

    I hate to admit this but our feelings on certain things really do change as we get older. 10 years ago, I would have preferred to get a new video game instead of an engagement ring but now that I'm older, I would prefer to get a domesticated raccoon instead of an engagement ring.

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  21. 28. sij
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