Memoirs of Hadrian by Marguerite Yourcenar. Arguably the greatest queer novel of all time. The love affair between Hadrian and Antinous is both wonderful and disturbing. It's pitch perfect, not for a moment does one think it is not written by Hadrian himself.
Yourcenar was a Lesbian, partnered with Grace Flick, yet she had a habit of falling in love with gay men. All her novels, that I know of, have a gay man as the main protagonist.
The Twyborn Affair by Patrick White. One of the greatest mysteries to me is how Patrick White is such a relative unknown in this country, particularly among queers. This was an openly gay man who won the Nobel Prize for literature for crying out loud.
Twyborn is a masterpiece. White is a master stylist, his language is incredibly beautiful. I can recommend many of his novels, but in this one he deals with issues of gender, some 30 yrs before it became popular to do so.
Time Remaining by James McCourt, a mess of a book. I truly believe that McCourt wrote it while on crystal meth or something, but one again, this is pitch perfect. I consider it the best AIDS novel ever.
Both are the kind of writing that let us know we are not alone. Barracuda is beautiful but TOO close to home. The Line Of Beauty, Hollinghurst, is another true story.