You had me at "Node.js [...] COBOL" https://github.com/IonicaBizau/node-cobol/ …
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Answer: calling toString() on a JavaScript function gets you the ENTIRE function text, including the comments. Then: https://github.com/IonicaBizau/node-cobol/blob/master/lib/index.js#L70 …
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This is what happens when you have no multiline string syntax, but you do have hilariously powerful introspection tools
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