Plenty of disagreements have been solved by sitting down and talking things through, yes, but bullying isn't mere disagreement, esp when the same pattern of behavior keeps repeating, and it's ridiculous to ask victims to sit down and solve differences.
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Replying to @alexelcu
It may be futile to hope that some differences can ever be resolved, though I prefer to try. But we shouldn't call marketing claims (and here I'm deliberately taking no opinion on them) "bullying" either, even if they're tiresome and bogus... unless you saw something I didn't?
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Replying to @propensive
You can try, I've always admired you for that, but unless the aggressor stops being an aggressor, at some point it becomes victim blaming. The repeated bullying behavior should be obvious, but I'll shut up, lest I might get a cease and desist letter
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Replying to @alexelcu
The best cease and desist letter is the one that doesn't even need to be sent... ;) But seriously, there's so much nuance in the interpretation of various tweets that in the case of
@jdegoes, everyone should at least be very precise in their criticisms.2 replies 0 retweets 3 likes -
There is so much ill-will and mixed context that it's very easy to characterize "aggressive marketing" as "bullying" or "disagreement" as "arguing". If anything, I'd encourage people to be focused in every reply, because there's a wide gray area that's exacerbating the problem.
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Replying to @propensive
I'm no longer interested in gray areas or giving him the benefit of the doubt, sorry. That ship has sailed. I guess I'm doing some "aggressive marketing" and "arguing" right now too, and will continue to do so
Please don't bring him again in my mentions.2 replies 0 retweets 17 likes -
Replying to @alexelcu
I wasn't talking about giving anyone the benefit of the doubt (I know that's lost already) and the gray areas are very much on both sides. I'm saying the opposite: be precise in your criticism so you are not misinterpreted by the people you need to convince.
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Replying to @propensive @alexelcu
This is not fair. Alex is has been very precise in his criticism in the past. It's disheartening to see every discussion with you boiling down to you telling the other person to be better. This is particularly bad when you read your own approach to criticize him.
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I agree that Alex is usually very precise, but I'm getting exasperated trying to find ways to deescalate this ongoing disagreement, when literally none of the parties involved are enjoying it, whilst at the same time increasingly unable to tolerate each other.
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Replying to @propensive @alexelcu
I get that, I really do. It's a commendable effort but you need to come to term with the possibility of failure. You can't let it affect you and make you answer impulsively. The way I see it, you are just reinforcing other people ideas in this way.
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I would certainly encourage everyone to avoid answering impulsively. After being dragged into a conversation I didn't want to be in just over a week ago, I can recommend against impulsive answers.
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But what would failure look like? A segregated community where people don't, can't or won't agree, where there's no pushback against mutual antagonism, and one where nobody actually cares about it any more because they've given up?
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I still care about it because it's not the welcoming community I want to be a part of. There were huge efforts made to make functional programming more welcoming to newcomers, particularly minorities, and that's a value I want to uphold and encourage.
1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes - Show replies
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