I had regrets but listen, you don't tell me what to do.
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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when i was smol my mom tried to tell me the restaurant we were having lunch at didn't serve cheeseburgers. i told her "yes they do its right in the menu." she had foolishly assumed i wasn't up to reading menus yet. words work for ME and don't you forget it
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Parents were cute one year with a card from the Easter bunny in my basket. I immediately asked, "Why does the Easter bunny and Santa have the same handwriting?"
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Yep. I figured Santa out when I was 4 because (a) we didn’t have a chimney, he would have burned up in the wood stove and (b) he had the same handwriting as my mother
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i used to dress up my toddler sized doll as jasmine & i as Aladdin and i would put on plays / dances for my mom as the two of them. “why is she jasmine and not you?” “because she’s pretty and i wanna dance with her duh” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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aww, babygay
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I think mine is when I started buttering the living room couch. Like not by smearing it, I kept taking tiny fingerfulls and carefully dabbing it on the back of the couch. Tiny little finger-dabs of butter covering the whole back of the couch, greasy cheerful baby luc
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And the thing is I KEPT doing it, like every time someones back was turned. They tried keeping it on top of the fridge, but I *still* grabbed it, which scared them bad enough they just kept it on the counter again. they literally could not keep me from doing this wierd thing.
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my kindergarten teacher wanted me tested for learning disabilities because i refused to answer their questions after listening comprehension stories, when in reality my argument was “you just read the story, how did you already forget what color the dog was”
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Oh I love this you genius baby you
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story you have from your early childhood.
Mine is when my mom told me not to touch the electric stove when it was red, because that meant it was hot, so I made direct eye contact with her and slapped my hand down on the stove top.