I have tried pointing out that you have no more right of access to someone else's mind than you have to their body even in a relationship.
Real love means respecting the partner's need to keep parts of themselves hidden from your view, shown only to others, or to no one. It means not bidding to monopolize their whole amusement park; not digging around in the graveyard behind their church.
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An annoying thing I've seen in films is when a character, usually a woman, gets all mad at her boyfriend for not telling her something about his life. She breaks up w/ him for this. Then he caves and tells her everything, and they get back together.
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I might be interpreting this incorrectly but it sounds like people should lead 2nd lives behind their partners back? I get this impression from: “parts of themselves hidden from your view, shown only to others.”
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And that is part of what trust is all about. And not being a control freak.
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Maybe. But it seems to me this sort of thing can breed an unhealthy distance if too many actions go unexplained. It's an art, that's all there is to it. Sometimes you have to reveal/conceal yourself, sometimes you have to expect these things from them. Totally contextual.
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