Patton OswaltVerified account

@pattonoswalt

Mr. Oswalt is a former wedding deejay from Northern Virginia.

Los Angeles
pattonoswalt.com
Joined May 2010
456 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. 46 minutes ago

    Oy! What a mitzvah!

    My kid is loving his first night of Hanukkah gift : Minecraft story mode. Thanks for being part of a fun adventure!
    7 retweets 91 likes
  2. Retweeted
    6 hours ago

    “As much as I fight with social justice warriors,I’m glad that they’re there": on comedy's PC debate

    View summary Hide summary
    26 retweets 114 likes
  3. Retweeted
    7 hours ago

    Thank you for your sacrifice.

    Growing up, I remember my parents never letting us have Asian food on December 7th. They were children of WWII.
    210 retweets 541 likes
  4. 7 hours ago

    Really want to listen to The Vapors' biggest hit song but it's Pearl Harbor Day so oh well.

    43 retweets 291 likes
  5. 9 hours ago

    This is everything. Jon Glaser has a new show on tonight. EVERYONE HAS TO WATCH IT. I can't wait!

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    7:03 AM - 7 Dec 2015 · Details
    83 retweets 313 likes
  6. 19 hours ago

    Day 6 My fickle friend, the Isle of Jura 21 year-old:

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    8:40 PM - 6 Dec 2015 · Details
    29 retweets 355 likes
  7. Retweeted
    Dec 1

    Can’t wait to see as TV’s Son of TV’s Frank!

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    2:35 PM - 1 Dec 2015 · Details
    60 retweets 251 likes
  8. Retweeted
    Dec 5

    i made a diaper out of the new york times and i wore it to star bucks and made them call me merry christmas. oh yeah, and i have agun

    524 retweets 1,467 likes
  9. Retweeted
    Dec 6

    listened to 4 of your shows, heard you fall in love, expecting, be a father. It was a nice progression, thanks for that.

    14 retweets 174 likes
  10. Dec 5

    Day 5 Michel Couvreur Overaged Malt

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    6:25 PM - 5 Dec 2015 · Details
    19 retweets 270 likes
  11. Retweeted
    Dec 5

    He literally shot holes in it because he figuratively couldn't.

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    165 retweets 843 likes
  12. Dec 5

    like how mass shooters "rebut" people they don't like but you did it with a paper lol you're cool & not scary

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    I shot holes in the NY Times editorial - This is what I think of the New York Times edito...
    250 retweets 734 likes
  13. Dec 5

    HA HA HA! If THIS doesn't motivate me to get in shape (get below "molester weight"?) I give up.

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    12:08 PM - 5 Dec 2015 · Details
    287 retweets 1,456 likes
  14. Retweeted
    Dec 4

    It's official!

    54 retweets 159 likes
  15. Dec 4

    Day 4 Glenfiddich "Gran Reserve."

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    9:30 PM - 4 Dec 2015 · Details
    71 retweets 595 likes
  16. Dec 4

    When I read "Harrison Ford dropped a huge spoiler" I just assumed he had lunch at . HILARIOUS TWEETS LIKE THIS 24/7 FOLLOW ME.

    467 retweets 1,951 likes
  17. Dec 4

    Look, I know what the hashtag is for and I'm VERY excited but can we all agree it sounds INSANELY SINISTER?

    157 retweets 778 likes
  18. Dec 4

    "It's up to you now, kid."

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    4:03 PM - 4 Dec 2015 · Details
    244 retweets 1,430 likes
  19. Dec 4

    Death must have been pissing its pants went it came for Robert Loggia.

    425 retweets 1,155 likes
  20. Retweeted
    Dec 4

    . on the PC Police and Why Comedy Is 'Pretty Fucking Essential'

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    1:02 PM - 4 Dec 2015 · Details
    147 retweets 391 likes

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