I saw what he was doing to members of this community. I saw how he behaved towards the people here. I knew of his alt twitter account. I did nothing. I should have quit years ago. Instead I just threatened to quit again and again and then never followed through.
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Because I allowed him to gaslight me into believing I couldn't achieve anything without him. That I couldn't even exist without him. Because I was afraid. All that became better after I started my transition. My confidence grew. But so did his frustrations with me.
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So in October 2020 he fired me and one of my team without notice (pay until end of contract at the end of the year but seize all work activity immediately). And he told everyone else he'd pay them until Nov and negotiate the conditions of their future employment until then.
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Ultimately none of my team stayed. But he re-hired that transphobe. Afaik it's just the two of them now. Since then he is forcing me to keep my shares of the company by only offering deals for my shares that would give him even more power over me and my life.
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He has decided that I am unable to even exist without him. And now he needs the power to destroy my life's work and my existence, so he can prove himself right whenever he wants. I can't give him that. All I want is for him to leave me alone. All he wants is control over me.
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This means I am probably not going to be able to stay in EDA, as the non-compete of his ghost ship company prevents me from working in that field. This is the expressed purpose why he wants me stay tangled up in the old company. To prevent me from ever working in my field again.
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I have no idea what I am going to do. All I know is that I can't allow him to stay in my life. At any cost. At *any* cost. I can't take one more day of this. I just can't. I need to get this abusive asshole out of my life but I don't know how..
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He'll probably sue me for a ridiculous amount over these tweets. And then offer me some kind of bizarre deal where I would give him even more control over my life in exchange for false promises that he'll only punch me half as hard, for a short while.
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I don't know what I will do next. Short term or long term. But I can't do this anymore. I can't live in a state of constant fear from my abuser. Anything is better than this. Nothingness is better than this. I just can't anymore.
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Replying to @oe1cxw
Stay strong! You're strong enough to be yourself by transitioning, so you'll get through this. Are non-compete clauses even legal? Even if he sues you, I'm one of the people who'd donate to a GoFundMe or similar, and I'm sure I'm not alone!
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Have to go through a court to find out to what extent it is legal. The penalty is 10 kEUR/month. He can wait years before executing on that..
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You’re doing super worst-case analysis here, which is a good engineering habit but not good for anything else. Get some advice. Bet you the worst-case scenario is infeasible.
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Replying to @kentindell @BitlogIT
I've spent a lot of money on legal advice already. At the end, I would kill myself before there'd be any outcome in court because I just can't stand this terror any longer.
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