The Opulent Couch

@occupied_stall

Former Luxuriant Plug. Lawyer turned Ventriloquist. Pardon my back. THIS IS JUST ENTERTAINMENT. Taken. No DMs.

Canada  
Vrijeme pridruživanja: lipanj 2017.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    19. pro 2017.

    I love when a tweet of mine takes the fuck off and gets 2 likes

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  2. Dick so fat you feel that Milky Way Dick vein throbbing when a muh fucker nuts all in them guts..

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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 minute

    I ate pineapple way before all you people started eating pineapple today.

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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj

    Pop tarts are a healthy breakfast - idiots

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    me: oh yeah baby, give me that big, hot load everyone else at the laundromat:

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    I don’t care if your menu options have changed. I’m pushing zero until I get somebody.

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    You piss me off, but I love you, nerd.

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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I'm worth it.

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Sometimes, you just wanna say fuck it, and make two fat ass PB&J sammiches and call it a night.

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  10. I’m at my horniest when I’m eating pancakes drizzled in maple fucking syrup. See? The word fucking wasn’t even needed but it came out cause, pancakes.

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 9 minuta

    Horny bitches on Twitter will make you and your wife cum.

    Poništi
  12. I wanna fuck no many of you.

    Poništi
  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. sij

    I just want a guy who will spoon with me while we watch porn.

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 18 sati

    Twitter smells like fuckbois today and it's not even Friday.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 11 sati

    We should be spooning naked.

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 11 sati

    You look like you fuck dirty. Call me.

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 18 sati

    If he looks like a fuckboi, talks like a fuckboi and acts like a fuckboi then chances are he's a fuckboi.

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 26 minuta

    Get you a girl who doesn't mind being the big spoon sometimes.

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    Low key I wish you came here and got your fix of me.

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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj

    'The road was such a mess and I’d never want you to travel it again but it ends with us.'

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  21. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 3 sata

    When I say 'please kindly...' I mean the fucking opposite.

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