Not sure people explicitly realise this, but when somebody is hurting and opens up and talks about it, one of the most hurtful things the other conversant(s) can do is reorient the topic to be about them and/or to be about jocular takes on the topic.
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Replying to @o_guest
I've also seen people realise they carry similar pain or that this is a safe environment to share when sbd opens up. It *can* work out very well, but they can cut each other off. I'm like "well I shouldn't interrupt either of you but this isn't great
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Replying to @emanuil_tolev
Realising you are carrying similar pain (almost always?) is the opposite to changing topic (what I called above in OP: "reorient the topic") and definitely is not the same as "jocular takes on the topic".
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Replying to @o_guest
Oh, absolutely, sharing in turn is not a jocular situation. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this btw. Acting well in such sensitive situations is super important and this is very helpful.
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