This might not be what you want to read, but you probably need to drop these people from your social life. Emotional and intellectual labour, e.g., you explaining to men what sexism and privilege is is a part of the sexism directed at you by the system.pic.twitter.com/yrRJOUrfYJ
No idea about Japan studies, sorry. Only speaking about what I have witnessed in my (sub)field(s) from Dutch men and women and people working in the Netherlands.
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I saw this work being presenting at CogSci last year — might help shed light on stuff a little as I was amused at where Dutch ends up:https://psyarxiv.com/7qd3g
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I don't know how much this really says though. It says Japanese has a way lower gender bias, but when you look at the position of women (wage gap, % in managerial positions), the Netherlands scores a lot higher than Japan.
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Of course language can play a role in how people think, but economic and sociological processes play a much larger role imo. Then again, I might be biased because those things are more important in my field :p
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While the Dutch word for scientist has a male-bias (wetenschapper, - er is a male suffix of sorts) and the Japanese word for scientist completely lacks such a bias (研究者=research person), Japanese academics are characterized by even more institutional biases towards women.
End of conversation
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I would like to hear more about what you mean with the particular backwardness of the Netherlands though. As a Dutch person, living and studying in the Netherlands, I agree that in a lot of ⇒