I have worked in a workplace where a certain person was so abusive to their research support staff they bought them gifts as stand-ins for apologies. The gifts kept coming but the abusive behaviour never changed.
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Also, there is literally nothing a partner could do after abandoning me without discussion on our honeymoon to earn my forgiveness. If I literally mean less to you than a comfy seat, you can fuck off.
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To be fair, this person doesn't think his wife means less to him. He thinks his wife's feelings don't matter. As an object she means a lot, I bet, hence the gift idea. As a real human: nope.
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The entirely notion of one adult placating another is toxic bullshittio. Placating is for tantruming toddlers, not fully autonomous adults.
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You're so right! And even there it's probably a questionable strategy in terms of efficacy and lessons learned, right? Haha.
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Definitely.
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