Meanwhile, an institute may think “we have programs to stimulate women; we’re doing good”. So nothing will change soon I’m afraid. As I see it: Women don’t need to be “trained” to play the academic game. IMO we best stop trying to train people to emulate problematic >>
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Amen to that

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So all in all, I find this idea that women can be trained to be thick skinned is fundamentally flawed. Not all men are thick skinned anyway and they magically do pretty well, right? And relatedly, training women generally as a solution to gender gaps is misplaced.
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People have been telling me my whole life to be thicker skinned and all I wanna do is scream.pic.twitter.com/NkxrAmvGva
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yup! on a similar point, i had written this a while backhttps://twitter.com/zerdeve/status/1013993900325736448?s=21 …
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I'm as thick skinned as they come and apparently have many of the prized 'male' qualities. And they tell me to act more feminine. Be nice, warm, sweet, less ambitious, more accommodating, etc. So really fuck it all. Be the best version of yourself. The end.
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I forgot the most common and most likely to make me dream of strangling you: you're intimidating
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Woman doing a thing ergo tell her she's doing it wrong.


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Lose, lose, either way.
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Preferably starting before kindergarten, before peer reinforcement lodges it so deeply that it's difficult to dislodge.
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You know the sad truth is as much as my childhood away from toxic male geeks worked nothing prepared me for the constant onslaught of "women can't code" I faced in the UK as a late teen/young adult.

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Most men I've met who say that, appear to feel threatened by women and want to keep a safe little enclave to themselves.
I've usually found that, although they may have some technical skills in they're not very useful because they're unable go work in teams.pic.twitter.com/JC2n6iip5p
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*go = to
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I've seen men who can work OK with a team of men but they just don't respect women, see them as equals. Think of your classic example of abusers, to help you imagine what's hidden: everybody thinks they are nice but certain people get treated very differently.
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I'll defer to your experience. I've never had the misfortune to work on a team of less than 30% women, except for one summer job running heavy machinery where it was too loud for much conversion.
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I think we basically agree though as these personality issues all eventually, somehow, bubble up.
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