The bar is so low. I can’t believe how many people are using “success” and “talent” as justifications for sociopathic and abusive behaviour. The mental gymnastics on the timeline are Olympic. The only good thing about moments like this is that people openly show their allegiance.
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It’s useful information for BW and anyone from a marginalised group. It’s all valuable intel. Black trans women have a life expectancy of 35. Yet mainstream culture wants to mine them for their contributions and leave them to die. We need to do better. We have to.
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But this isn’t just about that. It’s also about the lengths men will go to protect abusive misogynoir. Even nice guys; they’ll read bell hooks and do nothing about the abusive men in their proximity. This is one of the scariest forms of cognitive dissonance I keep witnessing.
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No matter how much feminist theory some men engage with and how kind the seem, the true battleground of praxis is how they hold the men in their lives accountable. How willing are they to call out and eventually cut off toxic men?
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The same guys who wax lyrical about wanting to be a Dad and even signal that they’d be willing to do a fair share of the labour of childcare, also won’t cut off the guys they know are abusive. By that logic they want to raise their children adjacent to potential violence. Absurd.
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I fucking really want to know which guys are abusive because it's a cycle of abuse. Simply telling them off feeds into their reactions. It's holding evil close. I want to know these people and how they have harmed and been harmed and watch them closely... shouldn't be outta sight
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I will fucking shut down any solidarity they try to get from me on the basis of being white and male. But I don't believe it's blindness or casting an eye away to show compassion to abusers and understand them, it's to fucking stop the abuse.
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I don't think this is what is being derided above.
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