Why start now?
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Pay someone. I'm a stay at home dad and still managed to convince my wife to let us pay someone to do it
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Step 1. Kill yourself, Step 2. You didn't do 'Step 1' correctly.
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This one will get you a Pulitzer!
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FAKE NEWS
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Start by kicking put your millenial deadbeat child who wont get a job
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Start by not having GARBAGE to your front door. Cancel your subscription to the FAILING
@nytimes today !!!

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No thanks, I'm just laying down for a nap.
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NOW...? Maybe after I eat my avocado toast!
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Get a wife. Bribe wife with jewelry Tell wife she's an awesome housewife. Repeat every 6 months if she starts slackin. Enjoy the Beer
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Hire housecleaner? Best money I spend all month.
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Bleach everything
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Hire a Mexican housemade....
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