Guy seated next to me on the tube was fast asleep. To avoid the awkwardness of waking him up to check if he had missed his stop, I pretended to be asleep too so that someone else would have to wrestle with the dilemma.
Have you experienced a petty crime in London? Click to tell us your story. (Your submission may be selected for publication.)https://nyti.ms/2RWvCGF
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Assuming no one did, of course, let me ask you: what
#Upminster is like nowadays? Had a pint each in the#Junction before heading back? Do reply, so that the editor can include in this weekend’s supplement, given how many replied with such great copy! If they only did#Irony. -
Miraculously, despite his head sliding down against the glass panel, he suddenly woke up right as rain and leapt off at Chancery Lane without even a thankyouverymuch!!
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I have never experienced petty crime in London. However, one time I was sent directly to jail. I didn’t pass GO and I didn’t collect £200. Luckly I got out on a double roll!
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When you said you had never experienced petty crime in London I knew instantly that you must have been either uttering a falsehood or you were a perpetrator of petty crime. I hope you have the decency to turn yourself in and stop dicing with the fate of others.
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I am merely a Top Hat trying to make it round the streets of London...
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You have no monopoly on that sort of thing in Olde London Towne so don't let it go to your head. Most male headgear, from Mayfair to Mornington Crescent, consists of top hats, bowler hats, flat caps and most female headgear of bonnets and wimples. Do you have a retinue of Tails?
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On a 3-week study abroad program in London, I was asked for directions to a tube station, and gestured in completely the wrong direction rather than admit that I was American and also somewhat lost myself. It haunts me
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Have MI6 not interviewed you ?
#thetowerawaits
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I was in a busy pub just yesterday, I knew the gentleman a few people to my right was there before me but he was looking at his phone. I placed my order without alerting him. I haven't been sleeping since.
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Hand yourself into the nearest police station ASAP. It maybe 60 miles away and the queue might be horrendous but you have previous for skipping these. Once you are locked up I can sleep safe.
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Tried to hand myself in. Queued for 14 hours (let 231 people through in front of me as penance). Apparently they were too busy with a young chap from Gatwick with a drone remote control to charge me.
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And now you come back on here boasting that you have got away with your crime. This is why London is going to hell in a hand cart. Still roaming the streets of lawless London nearly a week after the event. I’ve had enough i am moving to Paris it’s nice and quiet there.
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As a Northerner visiting London I have been known to commit petty crimes, such as saying hello, smiling or nodding to people I don't know.
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I didn't try direct eye contact, there are limits
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Came off the tube and the machine ate my ticket so I couldn't get through the barrier. Five hundred battle-hardened tube-users behind me all tutted as one, a truly terrifying sound.
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Once I put my credit card through the ticket machine instead of tapping it. They had to turn off all the machines in the station. At rush hour. Most terrifying moment of my life.
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And you survived?
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I went into a meditative state.
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NamMyiohoRengeKya!
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Exactly. And avoided eye contact.
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Eye contact? In London? London, United Kingdom? That London? Really?
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Sorry, not friendly warm eye contact, angry starey eye contact.
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