If every incel somehow got a girlfriend, the net violence in the world would only go up. Because guys who think like this are violent to their girlfriends. It's not their singleness that's dangerous; it's the way they think about women.
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The former might complain to their friends and carry a chip on their shoulder. The latter idolises and deify others who are abusive to, violent towards and even murder others in "retaliation" for this "hardship". It's disgusting and there is no comparison here.
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Incels aren't men who struggles with finding a relationship. He's never had them and his world view is influenced by feeling like he has failed at a fundamental level. Everything else is just window dressing.
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