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Here's a Tory MP arguing that a circus lion's natural habitat is riding around on a unicycle just outside Luton. pic.twitter.com/3OorYdJmSx
14 retweets 10 favoritesWhy don't women breastfeeding in public make it more fun for all by sending the milk along the Screwball Scramble course to the baby's mouth
8 retweets 10 favoritesThere's a subreddit for people who can make their ears rumble. People like me. Very special people. http://www.reddit.com/r/earrumblersassemble/ …
5 retweets 14 favoritesI've written a short piece of fiction about my favourite videogame developer, Peter Molyneux. http://www.pcgamesn.com/godus/an-interview-with-peter-molyneux …
37 retweets 41 favoritesdo you even lift off
25 retweets 21 favoritesAlso good. RT @GeeItSomeLaldy: @misterbrilliant A Bublé is a Souflé made with Boobs.
Stop to fully analyse why Bublé is a funny name: imagine laying a boob down, tucking it into bed, patting it on the boob. Goodnight boob.
9 retweets 14 favoritesNASA have just announced they can get better internet speeds on Mars than @BTCare can in my house.
Jurassic World ending has been leaked already. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epgXuMB1sF8 …
16 retweets 11 favoritesShut up I know ALL of the sex positions *bangs fist on desk so hard my screensaver turns off and wikipedia's list of sex positions is there*
20 retweets 42 favoritesJust checked and I definitely don't have any HIV. Not even a tiny bit. Get some of my blood in your mouth, it's totally fine. #WorldAIDSDay
I am a bad game developer. Lost all backups of my first-person NHS dismantling game. This gif is all that is left. http://i.imgur.com/YBzmI4w.gifv
3 retweets 7 favoritesOne day I will tell you about the time I let go of a balloon outside my house and saw it on the television at a horse race 20 minutes later.
7 retweets 31 favoritesDid you know? F·R·I·E·N·D·S was short for: F un having R oss Gellar I magination E lephant N iceness F riendship D Friendship
17 retweets 27 favoritesHey kids here's one "Guardian of the Galaxy" you haven't heard about *spins chair around backwards and sits on it* we call him Jesus Christ
149 retweets 187 favoritesQ: Which email folder is the coldest? A: Drafts. Q: Which email folder smells the nicest? A: Sent
28 retweets 32 favoritesReminder that @disappointment and I did one last issue of PC Zone all by ourselves. You can read it online here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5rSaNJ0myKyTUFpcUY2czdwNUk/view …
So cold tonight you can see my #nipple through my T-shirt and hoodie. pic.twitter.com/MynZRSmiqf
Amazing. RT @Pentadact: @misterbrilliant Are you actually trying this? It does work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJ3LFLhrdMU …
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