Mi'sen

and he'll eat my stews and soups that have carrots and onions and potatoes but lets be real if your mom asks if you've eaten a vegetable and you're like YEAH I HAD ONIONS AND POTATOES you know that doesn't count

and each individual preference is so reasonable he doesn't expect me to cook for him and in fact he's overwhelmed whenever I do he isn't some stereotype of a manchild at all frequently dresses better than I do manages his life very well all by himself

oh and get this in trying to ask for his dietary preferences he just said "oh I don't like cruciferous vegetables" which sounds 100% reasonable if you're just super into this guy and trying not to be weird or offputting anyways I was a victim of motivated ignorance here

but you know what "cruciferous vegetable" includes? ALL. OF THEM

fucking nice smart competent Midwestern boy who can quote Shakespeare and gets his clothes tailored it's a lie it's all a goddamn lie crafted over decades to conceal the fact that he has the dietary preferences of a fucking teenage mutant ninja turtle

you want to talk about psychedelic insight well this is my psychedelic insight I'm going to have this man's children and try to figure out how to get them to eat a vegetable or at least TRY IT before being swayed by their father's barbarian habits

fueled by the exasperated distress of a thousand grandmothers before me rn I don't even know why it seems so important to make people I love eat vegetables okay I KNOW all of the arguments I know the sad state of nutrition science I don't care

I will not forcefeed my children if they don't like vegetables but I will worry and I have no idea why