Contemplative fieldnotes: Had an interesting chat with a long term Vajrayana practitioner, about how a practitioner represents the dharma back to themself/others. They are quite convinced that the symbols/stories used to represent dharma, shape the ‘flavour’ of training a lot.
In terms of one’s practice, I think it’s good to reflect on this and try to gain some sort of visual on hidden assumptions with regards to states/stages, terminology we’re using to, desire better experience, desire for peace, revulsion, hopes, fears, etc.
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Eg: I noticed that I have a pretty subtle & ingrained preference — and intentional skew — for restful states of mind, so much so that I am deliberately breaking up my meditation when I start to veer towards stillness, so that I can investigate the mind more in full-chaos mode.
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Also helpful to look at imaginal elements in our practice, ritual aspects. Eg: I noticed that when I maintain a sense of lineage, the general texture of my retreat feels much more earthy, grounded, stable. I can see how one could make v.strong beliefs out of that sort of symbol.
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Feedback Questions: • Does any of that make sense? • Any immediate thoughts/insights in relation to those notes? • Has your relationship to traditional goals/stages/states changed noticably as your practice matured? • Does any of the above invoke an emotional reaction?
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