Miles Orru

@milesorru

husband, mother, confused. Self Made Millionaire. Compulsive liar

Banstead
Vrijeme pridruživanja: veljača 2009.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    27. lis 2019.

    *SCENE: In a French shop* "Excuse me, how much for this Nerf gun?" "19" "Yes, this Nerf, but how much is it? "19" "YES, this Nerf. How much is it?" "..." "..." *END SCENE*

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  2. 2. velj

    Facebook these days is less about catching up with old friends, but more about adverts for something you googled 10 mins earlier

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  3. 2. velj

    Nothing sums it up better than this. Brexit, the most pointless, masochistic ambition in our country's history, is done

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  4. 1. velj

    Well, at least we've got our sovrinty back now.

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  5. 31. sij

    I've seen enough movies to know that Jeremy Corbyn is going to come in at 10:59:57 and cut the wire to save Brexit.

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    27. lis 2019.

    *SCENE: In a French shop* "Excuse me, how much for this Nerf gun?" "19" "Yes, this Nerf, but how much is it? "19" "YES, this Nerf. How much is it?" "..." "..." *END SCENE*

    Poništi
  7. 24. sij

    "Birds flying high, you know how I feel. Shitting all over the place, they're just rats with wings. Vermin." Nina Simoan.

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  8. 24. sij

    This is the Russian dolls of recommendations. Follow , and . They really do represent the good people of Twitter. x

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  9. 3. sij

    A man came into the barbers shouting "SATAN CREATES WIGS". I said "don't come in here with your 'devil make hair' attitude.

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  10. 1. sij

    Chris Grayling organised this year's fireworks apparently

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  11. 31. pro 2019.

    New Year's resolutions. 1. (finish) learning Italian 2. take up golf (again) 3. run more (again) 4. qualify in something (anything) 5. quit Twitter (again, you distract me too much).

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  12. 30. pro 2019.

    Loved that bit in Elton John's 'Crocodile Rock' where he sings about babysitting Dwayne Johnson as a child. "I remember when [The] Rock was young..."

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. pro 2019.

    Amazing feeling to be standing on the very spot where one of the greatest musical compositions of the twenty-first century was composed.

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  14. 30. pro 2019.

    How many people started the year Maria Kondo-ing their underwear and now just sling them in the drawer like before?

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  15. 29. pro 2019.

    Remember that bit in the Queen's speech where she said "I really hope the get rid of fucking VAR this year?"

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    London? Still blue. 💙

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  17. 29. pro 2019.

    What a game. Come on Chelsea.

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  18. 29. pro 2019.

    at what point do England open the face and go for it?

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Iain Duncan Smith is going to be knighted. Knighted! After all the pain, poverty and hunger his policies have caused. Knighted! After running a campaign filled with lies and misinformation, + with a known Islamophobe at its heart. Knighted!!!The system is truly morally bankrupt.

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  20. 29. pro 2019.

    I have been banging the drum for the and podcast for years. If you haven't checked them out, this Christmas 'best of' is a perfect in to see if you will like them. Check it out, and be nice to people.

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  21. 28. pro 2019.

    It's not quite as good as A Tuna Frittata, but that was taken apparently.

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