I did the best I could, and thankfully said helpful things. It is my belief that this is the contemporary equivalent of spousal abuse in the 50s, something far more prevalent than realized and "unspeakable" so therefore no one speaks about it
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It's too disturbing, and awkward, and abnormal. Well, the result is that the victims end up having to carry the burdens by themselves. I don't know what to do with all this but it is occupying an enormous amount of my current thinking now that it hits close to home.
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I think the one thing that helped the most was having these people understand that they are not unique, and that there are mechanisms in place to make the situation better.
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A girl in my high school went to her parents to let them know her brother had been raping her and they dismissed her out of hand. I think about her all the time. There needs to be a system in place where she would know what to do & the people she confided in would know as well
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Sexual abuse is an epidemic that few people want to talk about.https://time.com/3978236/american-children-sold-sex/ …
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I care for a teenager in a similar situation. He stays with us occasionally as his relationship with his mom is still toxic. He's really open about his struggles, and calls me when he's at his limit but I wish I more tools to help him.
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Being there is the best thing you can do. Them knowing that they are respected, believed and not judged, is critical. Friendship won't magically make everything better, but it will make things less bleak and shitty...and from their perspective, that will be a huge deal.
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I went years thinking I was a shitty person. Years of therapy didn’t help. It was only once I was in a church sponsored support group did I realize people with similar experiences had exactly the same self image I had. My advice? Talk to people who’ve been there. You’re not alone
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Thanks for saying this
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This is a very important issue. If you don't mind my asking, what is a friend-in-law?
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Your partner's/spouse's/bf/gf's friend or the spouse etc of your friend
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