michael_nielsen

A conversational move I've only used a couple times but has reliably worked pretty well: "I am overthinking this social interaction. I know I'm overthinking it, but that doesn't help. Can you help me understand your side of it so that I can stop overthinking it?"

It especially works well with people who are in a sort of "weird" cluster who you can be pretty sure are either themselves very used to overthinking things or familiar with people who are. I've not tried it on anyone outside that cluster - I expect it would still work a bit.

The reason it works is: 1. It acknowledges that you know you're being weird about this and are asking for help with that rather than putting the onus on the other person. 2. It's very relatable and people would love to be able to say this. 3. People like being asked for help.

Generally the conversation goes: You: *request for help with not overthinking* Them: Sure You: *detailed infodump* Them: Here is how the situation looked to me...