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Melissa SM
@melvedya
Event producer and nonprofit fundraiser by day. Pro wrestling fan by night. Also dog pics.
back in RVAJoined February 2009

Melissa SM’s Tweets

Database Manager and I are nerding out over creating a perfect data import template in Excel. Some days it’s the small victories.
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I was on Twitter back in 2009 when hashtags were invented! Stop trying to explain to me how they are different from @ replies!
Word has come down from IT that Pokemon Go is not allowed on company devices. I really want to know who needed that clarified for them.
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It’s barely 10:30 and I’ve already told 3 coworkers that I don’t have time to fix their problems. Do not fuck with me today.
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Sometimes I forget I’m the token millennial at work. Then I spend 30 minutes googling “Outlook emojis” before remembering Wingdings exist.
The newest version of our database software at work is called “NXT”. None of my coworkers understand why that amuses me.
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My intern confided in me that she’s missed two periods, thinks she might be pregnant, and can’t talk to her mom about it. How’s your Monday?
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How fubar is my commute this morning? It only took 25 minutes of waiting for my Plan B train before I stopped caring when I get to work.
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Forgot to break my after lunch adderall in 1/2 before taking it. Let’s see how long before I go from Super Productive to just plain twitchy.
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She can’t be bothered for input on a $1M vendor contract I’m negotiating but is outraged she wasn’t cc’ed on a supply order email.
The coworker I most want to discuss David Bowie with got downsized last week and that about sums up my feelings toward my job at the moment.
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No really. Her subjects are so long that they don’t fit on one line. Sometimes Outlook just cuts her off mid sentence.
Thanks to my boss, Entire Email in the Subject Line has officially replaced Unnecessary Reply All as my biggest email pet peeve.
I take a perverse level of satisfaction in going to check on my laundry and seeing less than a minute left on the machine.