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@megatanner

Product Manager for // night time dreamboat on // squirrel in

Portland, OR
Joined December 2008

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  1. May 8

    2017 is by far orange's worst year in the history of color, ever.

  2. May 5

    Welcome to the orangepacalypse.

  3. May 4

    Sometimes I think about you when I pee.

  4. May 4

    5/4 be with you.

  5. May 2

    My moustache tastes like nickels

  6. May 1

    I aspire to the level of confidence it takes for a naked middle aged man to comfortably chat up another naked man in the gym locker room

  7. Apr 28

    TAMW you're alone at the bar & the bartender catches you tying the cherry stem in a knot & buys you a drink. Someone's getting lucky tonight

  8. Apr 27

    When your hair matches your chair. Nice job coloring your toupee

  9. Apr 25

    My shirt is too tight. Or my nipples are just really big. I'm not sure.

  10. Apr 21

    Just realized my underwear are on inside out. I like to live life on the edge.

  11. Apr 21

    Sometimes I leave my zipper down on purpose. Just to see who's eyeing the goods.

  12. Apr 20

    Just FYI if you have a in the afternoon your day will end with the most ferocious diarrhea you've ever experienced. Whoa

  13. Apr 20

    So this is what drinking bleach is like.

  14. Apr 20

    Don't let me die in vain, viva la frapsistance!

  15. Apr 20

    Crashing from a sugar high with the taste of sour birthday cake in my mouth... this may be my final sleep 😵

  16. Apr 20

    Is it possible to get instant onset diabetes?

  17. Apr 20

    I hope I'll be able to collect disability after this

  18. Apr 20

    WHY AM I DRINKING THIS POISON?

  19. Apr 20

    You'd think sour birthday cake and regret would taste better with vodka, it doesn't. But at least it's getting me drunk.

  20. Apr 20

    I wonder if I put vodka in this if it will taste better.

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