Timothy McSweeneyVerified account

@mcsweeneys

The Twitter feed of McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, & McSweeney's Books. We also publish books.

San Francisco, CA
Joined April 2009

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  1. Pinned Tweet

    Our humor website, McSweeney's Internet Tendency has a big announcement today!

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  2. "'I can’t believe it. They fucking forgot my birthday,' Sam sighs. Then she looks through the mail and realizes that the AARP sure didn’t."

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  3. Retweeted

    "'Claudia and the Case of Cultural Appropriation.' Cokie Mason dressed as what for Halloween??" Do yourself a favor and read ' BRILLIANT ' piece on the Super Woke Baby-Sitters Club.

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  4. "My great-great-grandfather lives in an AR-15 I keep in my kitchen. He’s very chatty. And he told me that if we enact any common-sense gun laws, all of the entities that live in guns will be subjected to unimaginable pain until the end of times."

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  5. Retweeted
    11 hours ago

    My Catholic School Teachers, Packing Heat - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

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  6. "I just feel guilty that I put HR in the position of having to have a really awkward conversation with Ben about how awkward the interaction was, but there’s really nothing I can do about it because I’m just like naturally very awkward."

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  7. Retweeted
    12 hours ago

    Can this please be a series, ? Dying to know what ever became of Duckie. Fifty Candles - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

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  8. - Apply mindfulness and restorative justice in my classroom. - Unlock my gun, you know, just in case. - Console a student related to a break-up or cyberbullying.

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  9. Retweeted
    12 hours ago

    Wow, this really nails the zeitgeist. LaCroix, "calorie-free wine", Ruth Bader Ginsburg serum...

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  10. Retweeted
    13 hours ago

    "He calls me into his office and closes the door… to promote me. He promotes me again and again. I am wild with ecstasy."

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  11. Retweeted
    13 hours ago
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  12. Retweeted
    14 hours ago

    Hilarious. And *sad* at the same time. My Catholic School Teachers, Packing Heat - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

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  13. Retweeted

    So, wow , this is *exactly* what happened to me *every* single day the 3 years I lived in New York. I was played by a young James Spader

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  14. Retweeted
    19 hours ago

    Season four of the Organist is now available through public radio exchange—in its entirety! Your public radio station can now join & in beaming episodes of the Organist through the airwaves of your community!

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  15. Hey SF: don't miss this March 4th reading put on by pals at Disorder Press at local favorite, !

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  16. Retweeted
    15 hours ago

    I've got a piece up on today. Really proud I got to put all my Baby-Sitters Club knowledge to use as an adult.

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  17. Retweeted
    16 hours ago

    This is perfect. Fifty Candles - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

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  18. Retweeted

    Painfully funny, in the way that the best satire is when tackling the absurd.

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  19. Retweeted
    17 hours ago

    “The goal of the liberal elite isn’t just protecting children from bullets. Their goal is to take away all of your freedoms and rights.” That’s not satire, that is a direct quote from my Facebook newsfeed. 😂😩

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  20. Retweeted
    17 hours ago

    Very funny. Very true. "At best 'Positive Vibes Only' sounds like a poorly branded free clinic. At worse, it makes disengaging from reality in favor of wishful thinking a lifestyle aspiration, which in 2018 is just mother-effing dangerous."

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  21. Retweeted
    17 hours ago
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