Woman: 'Which of those wines would you say is the smoothest?' Bartender: 'I don't know shit about them.'
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(I am on bartender's side here, mostly because he and I are forging a bond, alone inside while *every* other customer sits outside)
I stopped paying attention to him for a while and out of nowhere he shouted 'you fucking British hipsters' TAKE ALL MY MONEY BARTENDER.
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'I know, isn't that a shitty happy hour?' he commiserates to a newly arrived patron.
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'Let me ask you,' he says. 'If you order two Goose Islands, would you order Two Geese?'
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Tell him I love him
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