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matvelloso's profile
Mat Velloso
Mat Velloso
Mat Velloso
@matvelloso

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Mat Velloso

@matvelloso

Technical Advisor to the CEO at Microsoft and developer advocate at heart. Opinions here are mine only, don't take them too seriously

You can type anything here!
matvelloso.com
Joined April 2009

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    Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 22 Nov 2018

    Difference between machine learning and AI: If it is written in Python, it's probably machine learning If it is written in PowerPoint, it's probably AI

    5:25 PM - 22 Nov 2018
    • 8,408 Retweets
    • 24,016 Likes
    • Coin Ve Teknoloji Liam Weld Monika Balnytė なかにしゆう🐈 Denis Arnaud Joe Homan Hatiice Ivar Laks hasan tosun
    205 replies 8,408 retweets 24,016 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 22 Nov 2018

        Thank you, thank you, I'm here most evenings, making nonsensical jokes and swearing at keras LSTM because this input shape thing makes no sense what the hell

        10 replies 8 retweets 398 likes
        Show this thread
      3. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        I think this joke is over fitting...

        5 replies 18 retweets 493 likes
        Show this thread
      4. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        People complaining that I use keras lstm: I am not a data scientist, I can't probably tell k-means from a bowl of cornflakes. My PowerPoints are great though

        5 replies 11 retweets 295 likes
        Show this thread
      5. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Maybe I should start a career as a data science comedian... But then I'm afraid my sample size won't be large enough and perhaps biased too...

        6 replies 34 retweets 700 likes
        Show this thread
      6. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        A word of our sponsor: Since you're here, go try VS Code tools for AI, it's free: https://visualstudio.microsoft.com/downloads/ai-tools-vscode/ … (They call it "AI" but it's just Python and ML stuff, we're good 😬) Ok back to our normal program

        4 replies 21 retweets 202 likes
        Show this thread
      7. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Ok, another one: How many data scientists it takes to change a light bulb? 20 senior data scientists and one intern. The data scientists will argue over a month on the right approach and compete on separate papers while the intern will copy the solution from stack overflow.

        7 replies 245 retweets 1,311 likes
        Show this thread
      8. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Ok people, seriously: If this reaches 6000 likes I'm afraid I'll have to start making big data jokes and so God help us all...

        8 replies 6 retweets 228 likes
        Show this thread
      9. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Ok, all of you who are adding me on LinkedIn because of this post, I should warn you: I don't make jokes there because I'm supposed to "behave" and only talk about "work" and stuff and I don't know how to do that very well

        3 replies 8 retweets 182 likes
        Show this thread
      10. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Me winging it in a job interview: -Do you have experience with big data? -Well, yes... -So how would you query a big data structure? -With a... big SQL?

        9 replies 61 retweets 509 likes
        Show this thread
      11. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        I want to point out that yesterday I made this joke and today this happened: https://mspoweruser.com/microsofts-market-cap-leaps-over-apples-on-black-friday/amp/?__twitter_impression=true … So... You're welcome?

        1 reply 3 retweets 84 likes
        Show this thread
      12. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        If you think my jokes are hilarious, wait until you see my code

        3 replies 54 retweets 428 likes
        Show this thread
      13. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Ha, I could do this the whole day. (I actually have to, because that's how long it takes to train my model god damn it)pic.twitter.com/pORVKmbSVF

        3 replies 6 retweets 159 likes
        Show this thread
      14. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Data science is 80% waiting for your model to train and 20% swearing because it didn't work

        6 replies 70 retweets 350 likes
        Show this thread
      15. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Seriously, all of your asking "Now do one about Matlab!" For the last time: I DO NOT HAVE A LAB

        5 replies 12 retweets 225 likes
        Show this thread
      16. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        "If you're not a data scientist, then how do you know these things?" Well, funny story: Back in school I was a really bad student so every summer I had to stay for reinforcement learning...pic.twitter.com/2PX5LsGzgi

        3 replies 24 retweets 261 likes
        Show this thread
      17. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 23 Nov 2018

        Aaaaand we're about to hit 10K likes. This is crazy! Thank you all for liking/retweeting/participating. Go check Azure: http://www.azure.com  It's our awesome cloud platform, built by a bunch of wonderful people and it even does this machine learning stuff too. 😬

        5 replies 5 retweets 72 likes
        Show this thread
      18. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 24 Nov 2018

        I'm learning so much by reading these comments. For example, now I know that when data scientists want to call something dumb they say "OMG that's like linear regression"

        3 replies 10 retweets 116 likes
        Show this thread
      19. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 24 Nov 2018

        We got 16K likes! Because of that, I've just created a binary classification model here and found out that only 17.3% of you are data scientists. The others are laughing along because they don't want to look weirdpic.twitter.com/91Jae0y9Xw

        4 replies 2 retweets 112 likes
        Show this thread
      20. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 24 Nov 2018

        I also created a revolutionary unary classification algorithm and surprisingly it's always 100% accurate!

        4 replies 5 retweets 78 likes
        Show this thread
      21. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 24 Nov 2018

        Mat Velloso Retweeted threddyrex

        Sharing some of the best comments you might have missed:https://twitter.com/threddythetrex/status/1066079718024261632?s=21 …

        Mat Velloso added,

        threddyrex @threddyrex
        Replying to @matvelloso
        Jokes about AI basically write themselves.
        2 replies 6 retweets 97 likes
        Show this thread
      22. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 24 Nov 2018

        Mat Velloso Retweeted Simon Rolfmore

        https://twitter.com/cloudthethings/status/1066097031230513152?s=21 …

        Mat Velloso added,

        Simon Rolfmore @cloudthethings
        Replying to @matvelloso
        matlab (I am very, very bad at picture editing) pic.twitter.com/E25eojXcbg
        2 replies 0 retweets 50 likes
        Show this thread
      23. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 25 Nov 2018

        As we approach 20k likes, I want to remind everyone that we're always hiring talented people in this space. If you are active in the open source community, even more interesting to us. And if you are a diversity candidate, then please, please reach out to us.pic.twitter.com/MnHjlIvZnz

        5 replies 3 retweets 38 likes
        Show this thread
      24. Mat Velloso‏ @matvelloso 25 Nov 2018

        I mean, if you think this thread was funny, you should see the people we work with around here:https://channel9.msdn.com/Shows/This+Week+On+Channel+9/TWC9-Windows-10-Launch-Build-10240-is-10-Cortana-Analytics-Suite-Glimpse-and-more …

        0 replies 2 retweets 26 likes
        Show this thread
      25. End of conversation

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