Matt Ingoglia

@mattingoglia

Washington, DC
Joined August 2010
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  1. 7 Nov 2020

    Something mattered.

    1 like
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  2. 8 Oct 2020

    Boomers: Young people are so needy and think life's all about them! Boomers, on Facebook: IT ONLY TAKES 1 SECOND TO SHARE THIS POST BUT MOST OF MY SO CALLED "FRIENDS" WON'T DO IT

    2 likes
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  3. 24 Aug 2020

    Kimberly Guilfoyle is the 2024 GOP nominee. You heard it here first. If your hearing has come back yet.

    4 likes
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  4. Retweeted
    30 Jul 2020

    You won't have to worry about my tweets when I'm president.

    61,377 replies 75,395 retweets 692,379 likes
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  5. Retweeted
    1 Jul 2020

    Bruh, if your waiter looks like this, that means you need to take your bourgeoisie ass home and learn to cook until this thing is over

    471 replies 30,860 retweets 95,873 likes
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  6. 22 May 2020

    Seems hasn't disrupted the supply chain for Republican crocodile tears. Good to know!

    The issue wasn’t what Joe Biden said, because it was accurate. The issue was that it came from Biden. It also was clearly a joke that didn’t land. But I’m wondering where all this outrage was yesterday when y’all president declared his public devotion to a Nazi sympathizer.
    1 like
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  7. 15 May 2020

    This week in unexpected sources of nostalgia: stood on a sidewalk Metro vent just to remember the sensation.

    2 likes
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  8. Retweeted
    4 Apr 2020

    I work from home in mysterious ways.

    420 replies 8,057 retweets 51,285 likes
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  9. 3 Apr 2020

    This week shipped us 2 completely shattered lamps. We called & they expedited a replacement, which arrived yesterday & included ANOTHER busted one. 2+ weeks later we have 1 working lamp & glass all over. No luck on phone/Twitter. Please fix this & stop sending us garbage!

    1 reply 2 likes
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  10. Retweeted
    20 Mar 2020

    1,590 replies 60,694 retweets 210,623 likes
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  11. 24 Mar 2019

    Ugh, no one just lives in the moment anymore!

    2 likes
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  12. Retweeted
    2 Jan 2019

    23 years ago, from a refugee camp in Kenya, my father and I arrived at an airport in Washington DC. Today, we return to that same airport on the eve of my swearing in as the first Somali-American in Congress. 🙏🏾

    19,336 replies 55,976 retweets 310,445 likes
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  13. 3 Dec 2018

    Can't believe there are people in this world who actually look at screenshots instead of immediately judging the source based on battery life.

    1 like
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  14. Retweeted
    22 Nov 2018

    May we all open our hearts and reach across tables today. May we all find hopes and values in common. May there be pie. Happy Thanksgiving.

    3,953 replies 11,397 retweets 96,377 likes
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  15. Retweeted
    27 Sep 2018

    Chairman Grassley criticized Sen. Feinstein for mentioning Deborah Ramirez, Julie Swetnick, & other allegations against Judge Kavanaugh. He said we'll deal with those later. If the vote is tomorrow, when is later?

    676 replies 6,262 retweets 16,087 likes
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  16. 21 Sep 2018

    Life mystery: How do people waiting for a walk signal to change justify crossing after someone else does? What's the thought process? "Well I was planning to wait for the light, but instead I'll just follow that complete stranger into oncoming traffic."

    2 replies 3 likes
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  17. Retweeted
    10 Sep 2018

    when you finally got your quarterback

    56 replies 955 retweets 4,300 likes
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  18. Retweeted
    31 Aug 2018

    Bad content.

    Do you have a nemesis?
    Show this thread
    1 retweet 3 likes
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  19. Retweeted
    1 Aug 2018

    On this, Trump officials & I agree: they failed.

    195 replies 1,206 retweets 2,285 likes
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  20. 5 Jul 2018

    Don't let the soundproof door hit you on the way out, schmuck.

    EPA chief Scott Pruitt has resigned, President Trump says. Pruitt has been under fire for numerous scandals related to his spending, management and ethics.
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