“when you have no friends and are getting bullied + humiliated by women constantly & are told to both ‘man up’ and renounce your masculinity - it’s like the one bright light you see is this community.”
@mandystadt’s essay is nuanced and insightful, bravo!https://www.thedailybeast.com/sympathy-for-the-incel …
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Yeah l also think taking it as an exclusively sex oriented phenomena is a mistake. It’s massively about loneliness, alienation, atomisation. And as you suggest, broader structural, cultural, material changes have occurred making young men more vulnerable in very real ways.
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Oh for sure it's also about loneliness. Communities exist to solve the loneliness problem. But the name they have taken on is "involuntarily celibate." Sex (or lack thereof) is the title card for community membership. That seems significant to me.
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I think......I think the sex is secondary b/c of how the phenomenon mainfests. Take the example in the first article. The guy isn't a virgin. He's had sex, it just was an incredibly (seems to be) fucked up relationship & he was left scarred by the experience. It's the isolation.
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If you go (against all wisdom) to an incel forum, I think the sexual aspect is much more pronounced there than in the article. I think there is an attitude that sex is the most important part of life, and that those who long for a sexual desire are owed satisfaction.
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Not to say the alienation is unimportant, but I don't think this is describable by alienation alone.
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I keep going back to the acid attacks/ rape. That appears to be a power fantasy more than a sex one. And do they Foster community work to get groupons for flights to legal prostitution countries?
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I'm asking b/c it would appear that a simple answer for 'not able to get sex" can be had. And if they feel entitled to sex without paying any money, then it's not about the sex at that point, it's status and power.
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Oh for sure, it's about status and power. I suppose I tacitly assumed that was tied up in it but you're right to make that explicit.
End of conversation
New conversation -
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