Note that the ーs are what I can only assume is a Japanese convention of using that glyph to extend lyrics across tied notes (or maybe just poor notation here?), and aren't actual long vowels in the lyrics. There are no ーs in 「指をそっとか」.
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Notating it as dotted then tie I'll give them, since that avoids having dotted notes cross into a beat... but I have no idea what happened with the duplicated second line notation. Did... did their software barf on having one vs. two characters for a single note across repeats?
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not an accidental. original looks correct to me if read as two voices hitting the same notes slightly out of sync. also your version (dots only) is very hard to read for 4/4 time.
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The ♮ is unnecessary, A is already natural in the key. The previous bar had an accidental but it's obvious it shouldn't carry onto this bar. It's not two voices, those are just two different repeats and as far as I can tell the timing in the song is identical, as is the notation
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