Hector Martin

I don't think there's a well-known alternative that doesn't reference genitalia.

I've read plug for male and socket for female but that's either really confusing or I need practice to internalize.

Plug/socket does not mean the same thing as male/female. You plug in an XLR *female* plug into the *male* socket on the back of a microphone. Male/female specifically refers to the pins in that case.

I agree that plug/socket is a bad replacement for m/f. It's just what I saw suggested somewhere.

TBH though, I don't see the problem with m/f at all. It describes the idea well and it's based on a natural concept we all understand. It doesn't favor either side. Besides being perhaps amusing when you first encounter it, what's the issue?

IIRC objection is a sex vs gender thing. I'm fine with M/F too but curious if I was supposed to say otherwise and missed a memo.

Honestly, that sounds like a silly argument. Inclusivity is all about interaction in the context of humans; m/f connectors is just an abstract concept loosely modeled on a prevailing (though not universal) pattern. It doesn't claim to be a perfect match for reality.

I think the silly argument here is that things are assigned genetilia on the basis of their functions.