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"When was the last time you updated that server? You're running 5 year old daemons on this? Where is the update schedule?" "We don't have one" "What?!"
"Show me your backup strategy" ... "Tarballs on a cronjob. Bland. No taste. It's not even atomic. Is anyone checking the backups before they get sent to the server?!"
"Why is the monitoring system not working?" "It broke and the guy who set it up left and we can't figure out how to fix it." "So now how are you monitoring?" "We have a guy check that things work once an hour" *buries face in hands*
"You have all this amazing networking equipment, and then your upstream is a DSL line? This is madness! No wonder customers complain their downloads take hours to finish."
(to owner) "What do you mean you don't let your staff log in remotely?" "It's for security reasons?" "Security reasons? Bullshit. You don't trust them. You can't fucking stop micromanaging everything. And you expect them to do their jobs like that?"
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