An underrated dynamic in the gender wars is that not all conversational tactics are open to everybody. In particular, tactics men constantly use on each other, and laugh off, are seen as crushingly emasculating and humiliating when used by women on men.
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There’s a law of large numbers here. When you’re part of a small sample, you’re far more on guard with yourself and others in the small sample, since the marginal reputation all damage to all from the actions of one are high. Large sample = statistical security.
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I think salience has to be an effect to, not just representation - female gender is the “marked” gender in languages, more salient
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As in the non-normal variable binding requiring explanation? Security through null hypothesis obscurity
End of conversation
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