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  1. Jun 7

    When did Siri get so sassy?

  2. Jun 2

    Tomorrow will be better right? 😔

  3. Jun 1

    Random stranger: Have you got the time? Me: Sure it's 9:40 Stranger: In the morning? Me: Erm, yes?!

  4. Retweeted
    May 31

    It's all coming together.

  5. Retweeted
    May 31

    HOLD THE DOOR HOLD FE DOOR HOLD FE FOOR COLD FE FOOR COV FE FOOR COV FE FEER COVFEFE

  6. May 9

    A massive thanks to for tickets to see The Graduate last night at the . It was fantastic!

  7. Apr 7

    The problem with paying on your phone is that I've no idea how you signal to the waiter that you want to pay with it without looking stupid.

  8. Retweeted
    Apr 5
  9. Mar 21

    Ive never come across a company that enjoys filling my inbox more than . 21 days in to the month and I've already got 14 emails

  10. Mar 12

    Take migraine meds so I can feel well enough to drive home. Meds tell me not to drive while taking them.

  11. Mar 12

    Sitting in B&Q car park hoping my migraine will go away so I can drive (safely) home.

  12. Retweeted
    Feb 26

    This picture has NO red pixels. Great demo of color constancy (ht Akiyoshi Kitaoka)

  13. Jan 19

    Day 4. Really must buy food.

  14. Retweeted
    14 Dec 2016

    First-ever customer delivery is in the books. 13 min—click to delivery. Check out the video:

  15. 25 Nov 2016

    So what you're saying is, it's Black Friday?

  16. 19 Oct 2016

    Dear body, I'd really appreciate it if you would just let me sleep. It would be a treat not to feel exhausted every single morning. 😩

  17. 30 Sep 2016

    I love making new friends on the train. The 8 people sandwiched up to me probably aren't quite so keen.

  18. 29 Sep 2016

    I don't want to sound stupid here but I'm getting rained on and the sky looks like this....

  19. 28 Sep 2016

    There's something oh so satisfying about this. 😀

  20. 17 Sep 2016

    Just had a dream where my 'pet' crocodile was trying to bite my hand off as I was taking it for a walk. Umm?!

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