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  1. Jun 2
  2. May 20

    Dial Corp really phoning it in on their knockoff branding

  3. Retweeted
    May 17
  4. Retweeted
    May 16

    Is it normal to wake up at 4am on your honeymoon to go diving with Great White 🦈?

  5. Retweeted
    May 11

    Look both ways before​ crossing the street kids

  6. May 6
  7. Apr 23

    3 hour flight delay and still gonna be a photo finish on whether the ATL airport WiFi finishes downloading my movie in time

  8. Apr 16

    No one is more efficient than an NYC manicurist.

  9. Retweeted
    Apr 8

    Take a picture, not a trophy. This is how real men shoot animals.

  10. Retweeted
    Apr 7

    Cone of shame? Or travel pillow?

  11. Retweeted
    Apr 2

    3 miles down is way more fun than 3 miles up. Marin bike gang

  12. Retweeted
    Mar 30

    The Trump White House: The plot of House of Cards with the characters from Veep

  13. Mar 23

    Happy to my main puppy squeeze Zeus! 🌩️⚡👑

  14. Mar 1

    Actually crying at how funny Netflix special is. Go watch!

  15. Feb 13
  16. Retweeted
    Feb 5

    Backseat fit for a Greek God

  17. Retweeted
    Feb 4

    There needs to be a term for the anxiety of waking up on West Coast time knowing you are going to be confronted with insane Trump tweets

  18. Feb 1

    . is officially my favorite Twitter follow of 2017 so far.

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