So much for trying to sleep before midnight...
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Lazlo D. Plumber
@Lazlo_D_Plumber
Infosec folk have it easy: I don't even have opposable thumbs. One of those attrition.org jerks. Ordained Minister in The Church of The Flying Spaghetti Monster
Fixin' yer terletJoined February 2012
Lazlo D. Plumber’s Tweets
Holiday weekend. Neighbor is power washing his driveway, fireworks are going off, my sister is driving in to stay with me, and I want a nap.
So, yeah... everything is just fucking perfect.
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Last thought of the night:
Just once, I want to wake up AFTER 5am and not feel like I'm late for work.
This will likely not happen any time soon.
Want to know what I used to do for a living?
Left ear only on stereo headphones. "Ready on 1, open mics, cue, roll 6, punch, roll 7, crossing 7, punch, roll 8, crossing 8, punch. Back on 1 in 3. Cross intro. Ready 1.
First 15 seconds every night.
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Last thought of the night:
I used to eat and sleep... but I still do too.
Just not as much as before.
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Last thought of the night:
I have two happy and sleeping cats. Do you know why?
Because I don't micromanage them. That way, I can sleep as well.
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This is my friend Mikey. He is in our fantasy football league.
Both of items are now under review after seeing this picture.
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Sometimes I get so mad I want to throw my lunch across the room and leave ketchup dripping down the wall... but I dont because I'm not a 7 year old.
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Last thought of the night:
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Last thought of the night:
Nothing surprises me. If I had to make a Venn diagram of what does, it would be an empty white sheet with one word: "nothing".
And now this tweet will be stored somewhere and in 200 years, someone's gonna say... "wow, that's deep."
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Not everyone wants to be or should have to be a parent.
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Last thought of the night:
June 25. 10 days away from "The 4th of July". People are shooting off fireworks to celebrate "independence" before city law and regulations allow it.
Most of them can afford fireworks and have not had vasectomies.
Please ponder.
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For - do we have a potential recruit?
I'm kidding, of course, but yeah... this is it.
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Years ago, company termed a sysadmin. Had a test box under his desk and I was called to "hack into it."
Go to his desk, everyone watching. I sit down in his chair, take a deep breath, and type "root".
Type in the root word for our SMTP boxes. I have root.
Mic drop. Walk away.
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Last thought of the night:
"right of the people to keep and bear Arms"
It does not specify "guns" and it discriminates against paraplegics who do not have arms.
Give someone with no arms, two feet, and a butter knife and a ninja sword. Attack them. Your day is over, baby.
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It just started raining here.
That is my cue to go stand outside naked and shower to save on energy bills.
Think about how many new neighbors you might meet if everyone did that. One big energy-saving neighborhood. Reducing costs a dick and a boob at a time. Bring your own soap
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Last thought of the night:
Infosec people, young and old: it doesn't matter what you play as long as you know how to play it. Take your brain out of "that" space and think about this:
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We at attrition.org fully support BLM and LGBTQ+ movements.
With that said, it would be totally rad if people would also consider neurodiversity as another thing to support. ASD, ADHD, all of it. We can't change ourselves any more than any of y'all can.
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So this happened:
Ask a team leader for your performance metrics. They say they sent them off to the project lead, who bumped them up by 50%. TL then says "I have to ask for them."
Send me your fucking original copy. I had an A in college level calc and finite math, Dare ya.
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Well, my sister texted and may come visit for four days over the July 4 weekend.
She insists on sleeping in her van, but... July 4. Like, jesus, take something vegan into the guest room, eat it, and go to sleep next to the AC vent.
Fuckin' hippies.
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Last thought of the night:
I usually go to bed around 8pm, say I'm going to read a book chapter, and I'm lying to myself because I just turn out the light.
Can't fall asleep, forgot the melatonin, get up and take it at 9pm.
Awake at 3am, tired by 9am. So, niterz. Pillowface.
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Last thought of the night:
At least 10% of you should be Buckethead. If it's not, try harder.
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Hearing on last night's episode of was awesome. Forgot to tweet about it earlier. :)
Last thought of the night:
If you fall down the stairs and don't land on your feet, you'll be OK.
Try again, or fins another set of stairs. Skateboarders have been doing that for decades. Ollie, blunt, crooked, whatever.
Or go vert.
Last thought of the night:
I don't have a kid, never wanted one. If I ever did, I would want him/her to be just like this:
Screw this. TLH is one of my top 3 favorite Batman books, hands down.
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The first 4 minutes of "Spiderhead" on NFLX are glorious, just to hear Supertramp over the opening credits.
No other spoilers.
If you need a smile today, here’s a wonderful outtake with Robin Williams and Elmo 😂❤️
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Going to watch Smerconish morning. Today's survey question for his show:
Do the benefits of artificial intelligence outweigh the dangers?
Not promoting, but I'll be interested to see the survey outcome. Usually ~20K voters per episode.
Last thought of the night:
As I was putting down the laptop, my neck cracked three times and my back cracked twice.
I guess my days as a professional wrestler are over, but Ric Flair has outlasted me by 20+ years.
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Last thought of the night
All animals on my property are protected by me with all of my will, unless they are human.
"Don't you dare hurt that spider. You're mowing my lawn, she's trying to survive. SHE HAS MORE RIGHTS THAN YOU."
No doubt.
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For - in South Park: The Streaming Wars, Cartman was washing his hair with ketchup. I instantly thought of you.
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I want to play a game.
You have 100 on something and you gain 25. What is your percentage of gain?
After that gain, you lose 25 of it. What is your percentage of loss after the gain?
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Here's a funny bit.
Called CVS for my BP med refill. They said it was last refilled 35 days ago. It was a 30 day supply.
Told the rep I don't care if I croak, but gonna get pissed if he doesn't get fed.
She expedited the order, but I still have to pay for it.
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Last thought of the night:
Why, yes, it was my head that smashed the drywall in the hallway.
Elbow? I went to college, I was using my brain.
(true story)
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