grant stiles

@lasersandpizza

bat out of he'll, gen z comedian, 8th grade reading level in the 7th grade

cincinnati, oh
Joined July 2011
110 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

You blocked @lasersandpizza

Are you sure you want to view these Tweets? Viewing Tweets won't unblock @lasersandpizza

  1. Pinned Tweet
    9 Oct 2017

    You (idiot): runs to get out of the rain Me (big brain/seen mythbusters): walks slow & badass knowing i will get wet the same amount

    5 replies 85 retweets 201 likes
    Undo
  2. 5 hours ago

    a tshirt that says "i'm with stuber"

    1 retweet 2 likes
    Undo
  3. 15 hours ago

    well slap my ass and call me Stuber!

    1 like
    Undo
  4. Jul 16

    me after I crush at an open mic:

    1 retweet 14 likes
    Undo
  5. Jul 15

    hard to explain to anyone that's not exactly my age but at one point it was really, really cool to listen to mac demarco. my generation's jonathan richman.

    3 likes
    Show this thread
    Show this thread
    Undo
  6. Jul 15

    starting a men's indie DIY blog where we do quizzes like "which mac demarco album did you stop listening at?" and "how many times last year did you almost get tricked into being conservative by youtube?"

    1 reply 3 retweets 34 likes
    Show this thread
    Show this thread
    Undo
  7. Retweeted
    Jul 14

    My son’s birthday ended with a bang! We are so ready for this season thanks NJ Devil for coming to the birthday party.

    37 replies 208 retweets 775 likes
    Undo
  8. Jul 14

    the stock photo results for "pizza slice with a face" are all over the place but also...horny?

    2 retweets 11 likes
    Undo
  9. Jul 9

    me opening my netflix special: ok real quick. want to address a situation that happened to me about a yr and a half ago. audience: yes, good. me: one time I couldn't find the bathroom fast enough so I pooped my pants at a kroger. audience: crying, clapping.

    1 retweet 10 likes
    Undo
  10. Jul 9

    I never want to be a businessman bc theres always the fear of accidentally slamming a briefcase down on your dick.

    1 retweet 8 likes
    Undo
  11. Jul 7

    when nerds get divorced it's called rage-quitting a marriage.

    4 likes
    Undo
  12. Jul 7

    excited for the "all-star game" where ballplayers & fans come together to toss throwing stars at the mascots.

    2 likes
    Undo
  13. Jul 2

    went to the zoo with and in chicago. we got bit on the dick by the animals.

    1 retweet 5 likes
    Undo
  14. Jun 30

    tried making a funny twitter video that would be both viral and relatable:

    2 retweets 8 likes
    Undo
  15. Jun 28

    He started the joke by saying "I saw this in a meme actually" and then he just said the meme and people died laughing, changing comedy forever.

    5 likes
    Show this thread
    Show this thread
    Undo
  16. Jun 27

    still thinking about the comic who's biggest joke was just explaining a meme he saw and won his round of the comedy contest I saw on wednesday lololol.

    3 replies 2 retweets 23 likes
    Show this thread
    Show this thread
    Undo
  17. Jun 27

    instagram is easy for me bc im a world traveler, im hot, and i dont have anything meaningful to offer this world.

    1 retweet 9 likes
    Undo
  18. Jun 17

    it's really cool that NASA paid Stanley Kubrick all that money to go to the moon and fake the moon landing.

    1 retweet 6 likes
    Undo
  19. Jun 16

    tough day for me because my kid wont talk to me because im a gamer.

    2 retweets 5 likes
    Undo
  20. Jun 14

    the only dog who can stop a bad dog with a gun is a good boy with a gun.

    1 retweet 5 likes
    Undo
  21. Jun 13

    everyone ive met who does improv could be a doctor or something but instead they're like "buddy you dont understand. one day im gonna do my 'dr poop' character on comedy bang bang."

    1 retweet 8 likes
    Undo

@lasersandpizza hasn't Tweeted yet.

Loading seems to be taking a while.

Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

    You may also like

    ·