Hi Annie :) I'm in the Antipodes too! It kind of feels like you're talking over someone in your anger, & having trouble "connecting" right now. I'm sure you'll tell me that you're very well connected with people around you. Maybe you could role model that, instead of attacking?
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Annie, it sounds like you're handing your personal power to Incel culture. It sounds like you're saying that you subscribe to their "rules". I suppose that's one way to develop a cohesive society, but it would end up like "A Handmaid's Tale". Could you rephrase, maybe?
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And now you’re being obtuse. I’m saying that the obligation to connect (as from the original post, and subsequent ones) to men like this puts people in danger because their rules are arbitrary. That is why demanding that it is society’s obligation to connect is a dangerous one.
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It is society's failure to connect that has caused it. There is a whole field called Social Psychology. "We" as a collective, not as individuals, ARE responsible. "We" have to stop creating people with Incel (& other damaging) beliefs.
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And yet “society” isn’t the one being asked to make connections. Society can’t do that. Individuals have to make connections. And these guys aren’t raping and killing “society”, they’re raping and killing us.
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3/ I'm starting to wonder if you're trolling me, with the insistent clinging to an idea that I (& now also the original commenter) have repeatedly refuted
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Okay. I’m exhausted and can’t do this anymore, so here’s my position and then let’s just call it quits. None of this is about unrequited love, it’s about certain men’s inability to accept that a women is not their for their enjoyment. Inadequate social conditions have been part
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of this. Requiring society to make connections with these men puts people in danger. It is no-one’s responsibility to “fix” them, and holding people (and in particular, women) responsible for the actions of an individual because they failed to connect, is unacceptable. I see
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your point about society creating and environment were these kind of people flourish, and it’s valid. The original poster’s point is still wrong, and she has not convinced me otherwise. Thank you for your discussion, I wish you well. Peace.
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discount that knowledge and connect with them. That it is our responsibility to engage with these men to show that society can help them, yet with modern history showing that as soon as you break their arbitrary unknown rules, they will harm you.
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I have not said anywhere that individuals should seek out an Incel each and try to reprogram them through personal interactions. (Although, that is the Christian model of "friendship evangelism".) What I am saying is that the existence of Incels is a symptom of societal failure.
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That we can agree on.
End of conversation
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Being told to follow "Incel rules" by who? Certainly not me! I'm talking about the need for Community Development & Social Education programs.
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I did not say that you said we must follow incel rules. I said that if we “connect” and then fail to do so, that will inevitably harm us.
End of conversation
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