kresge

@kresge

Sometimes

Dallas, Pennsylvania
Joined April 2008
2 Photos and videos Photos and videos

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  1. 24 May 2016

    57 degrees at the game and there are "men" wearing down jackets.

    6 likes
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  2. Retweeted
    2 Jan 2014

    How to make men's skin care products: 1) take women's products 2) paint the bottles black & gray using shoe polish 3) write FOR MAN ONLY

    6 replies 31 retweets 107 likes
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  3. Retweeted
    5 Nov 2013

    .

    22 replies 101 retweets 82 likes
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  4. Retweeted
    2 Nov 2013

    I just took $4 out of my daughter’s piggy bank to tip a delivery guy. What’s the appropriate interest rate to avoid going to hell?

    9 replies 4 retweets 3 likes
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  5. Retweeted
    30 Sep 2013

    Huell & kuby one more time

    12 replies 66 retweets 137 likes
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  6. Retweeted
    22 Sep 2013

    a little over 12 hours until LOW WINTER SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    11 replies 73 retweets 153 likes
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  7. Retweeted
    31 Aug 2013

    If I were you, I'd muddle an orange slice & some bitters together in a hi-ball glass, add ice, Maker's Mark, & ginger ale.

    57 replies 121 retweets 229 likes
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  8. Retweeted
    21 Aug 2013

    Went to the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame and Rolling Stone jumped me with ELVIS WAYNE sike its Madam Ts Wax

    18 replies 43 retweets 42 likes
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  9. Retweeted
    3 Jul 2013

    Pirates manager Danny Murtaugh enjoys a chew during a 1970 game against the Astros:

    18 replies 40 retweets 33 likes
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  10. Retweeted
    30 Jun 2013

    The word “electrocute” is only accurate if the person dies (electro + execute). If they survived, they weren’t electrocuted.

    60 replies 881 retweets 561 likes
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  11. Retweeted
    30 Jun 2013

    If you find a baby bird and try to feed it every 2 hours and it doesn't eat, put it back in the nest and go tell your mom you're a lesbian.

    3 replies 25 retweets 54 likes
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  12. Retweeted
    30 Jun 2013

    Larry King on why he did his new web show: "This Internet, it's the next big thing." Five days ago.

    6 replies 26 retweets 21 likes
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  13. Retweeted
    27 Jun 2013

    Brad Pitt in WORLD WAR Z: 49 years old. Wilford Brimley in COCOON: 49 years old.

    39 replies 213 retweets 76 likes
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  14. 26 Jun 2013

    Smoothie Master: A Crazy Chef Adventure by TabTale LTD

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  15. Retweeted
    9 Jun 2013

    Good news! If your bellybutton is pierced, you can just reach down, pull that shit out and throw it in the trash. Nice n' easy!

    35 replies 516 retweets 855 likes
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  16. Retweeted
    9 May 2013

    Bob's Burgers might be my favorite comedy on TV right now. Oh, you didn't ask? WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE.

    2 replies 5 retweets 16 likes
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  17. Retweeted
    4 May 2013

    In Big, does Tom Hanks fuck that lady?

    15 replies 6 retweets 34 likes
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  18. Retweeted
    4 May 2013

    It's a wrap: Fans flock to Scranton for "The Office" party

    6 replies 19 retweets 9 likes
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  19. Retweeted
    1 May 2013

    This is a bummer. RT : Sources say Chris "Mac Daddy" Kelly from the group Kriss Kross was found dead in his Atlanta home.

    2 replies 8 retweets 6 likes
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  20. Retweeted
    28 Apr 2013

    I can't put new napkins on top of old ones without feeling bad for the old ones who were probably so excited that it was almost their turn

    16 replies 96 retweets 221 likes
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