I will never forget talking to @MarkPeriphery on the phone the day after I got a tattoo. "Does it tickle when you take a shower? A woman and her daughter heard me say that and are now staring at me."
There is nothing more confusing than standing next to a random person when they’re talking to someone with Bluetooth headphones Lady, looking directly at me: “Hi Alice did you poop today?” Me:pic.twitter.com/bdochGDcWJ
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Oh my GOD
so good
End of conversation
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(I kid I kid, but good lord how awkward lmao
)pic.twitter.com/HrYtRkBa4C - End of conversation
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I used to looooooove doing that to people
Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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