Kelsey E. Thomas

@kelseyethomas

Writer + editor in Philadelphia forever dreaming of my PNW roots. Currently: & .

Philadelphia, PA
Joined September 2009

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    8 Jul 2020

    If churches could make me wear an uncomfortable, soaking-wet cotton t-shirt over my swimsuit in middle school to keep 12-year-old boys ~from stumbling~ they can make their congregants wear a damn mask to keep attendees from dying.

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  2. Jan 19

    Then again, a pandemic and armed insurrection didn't stop us from delivering our oh-so-important deliverables, so I'm sure I'll be spending the Civil War on Slack as well.

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  3. Jan 19

    Working in corporate America right now is like "I'm free to connect after 1 p.m. tomorrow, assuming a civil war hasn't broken out by then."

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  4. Jan 13

    This is a pitch to trade QAnon for Pitch Perfect 237 as the country's leading conspiracy theory.

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  5. Jan 6

    There’s becoming a clear distinction/debate on the left between camp “this isn’t who we are as Americans” and camp “clearly it is.”

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  6. Jan 6
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  7. Jan 5

    Real West Philly inauguration month vibes

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  8. 24 Dec 2020

    I credit this like 90% to that urbanist memes for transit-oriented teens FB group. iykyk.

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  10. 10 Dec 2020
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  11. 12 Nov 2020

    "For some time, Americans have felt like life has no meaning. Gritty also has no meaning."

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  12. Retweeted

    If this is a problem they’ll need to file this lawsuit in Texas, too, but they aren’t for obvious reasons.

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  13. 6 Nov 2020

    Philly keeping everyone on their toes by flipping from dancing mailboxes to “SMASH THAT PRETTY BUG” real quick

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  14. 6 Nov 2020

    It’s really a shame Halloween just happened because I for one would love to see some toddler-sized Steve Kornackis walking around with a calculator and map.

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  15. 5 Nov 2020

    I lived in Philly for at least 6 months before I learned that DelCo wasn’t in Delaware.

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  16. Retweeted

    How to mislead with maps. (Land doesn’t vote — people do.)

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  17. 5 Nov 2020

    Subtweeting all my friends from other states who have sent me sass

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  18. Retweeted

    just livin in a boarded up powder keg of a city in the moment that a perfect storm of conditions made it the epicenter of an election with global consequences during a pandemic

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  19. Retweeted

    Did you vote absentee in AZ, MI, WI, NV, PA, GA? Check that your ballot is being counted! Here's where:

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  20. Retweeted
    4 Nov 2020

    National mood: Receiving a "we have to talk" text and then this for, like, 36 to 72 hours.

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  21. Retweeted

    PA says they won't be done counting until Friday. Fulton Co GA won't be done counting till Friday. has lost almost 300,000 ballots that a federal judge demands they discover. No one can declare victory tonight. Or even tomorrow. Probably not until next week

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